Transforming Trauma

2024, September, Issue 113

Seeing this illusion, we see

We understand that this pain or that

Excruciatingly unpleasant experience

Is not real, is not real, is not real;

We see that the unreality of it

Can be transformed going forward;

Calling from inner strengths, not

Not allowing ourselves to give up

No matter what, no matter what,

We own this trauma, we can do whatever,

We can do what ever we please with that,

That trauma, that trauma, that trauma

That trauma we see as nothing whatsoever;

We can turn trauma into anything we want

Transforming that illusory energy

With Bodhicitta, with true enlightenment mind,

We can transform any trauma into awakening.

A poem by Robert Aho © 2024

We all experience trauma from time to time.  It’s not unusual, even though the pain of it may create the illusion of your own isolation.  This world is nothing other than trauma from day one.  We would like to think otherwise; however, each little thing whittles us away into nothing over time.  The trauma of life, beginning with birth, is nothing other than an endless cycle of struggles, pain and falling apart.

We might like to simply curl up into a ball of depressed darkness; however, for those who are on the Spiritual Path, trauma is an opportunity.  It should really be accepted as a blessing.  Trauma, though so incredibly painful, gives us all the reason we need to open our heart and mind completely.  It is this world that inflicts trauma; and, in that, this world can be rejected as a path of complete futility and sorrow.

I had the good fortune of being attacked by many people in the Spiritual Community whom I trusted completely.  Instead of letting that drive me away from my own Spiritual Path, I utilized it as an opportunity to go even further.  It seems that my own spiritual progress was creating very bad feelings with others who were comparing themselves to me.  The usual gossip, going behind the back, spreading rumors, whispering to authority, causing alarm routine, came out of nowhere.  Fortunately enough for me, I had progressed sufficiently far enough so that I could transform it all immediately.  I let things go instantly.  I turned my practice into something quite fierce.  I found Dzogchen in short order.

Preparing for such trauma, when we are on the Spiritual Path, is much like preparing for death.  We must prepare to let those things go that we find precious.  We must prepare to remain at ease when the world collapses around us.  If we are practicing every chance we get, then we are preparing for the worst; and, the worst is sure to come, especially when we are getting closer to enlightenment.  Your own spiritual success makes you a target.  The world doesn’t want you to succeed, not even many of those who seem like they are to be trusted.

Your Spiritual Path is not a group activity.  You are born alone and you will die alone.  How you traverse this great gap between illusions is up to you.  You must always protect your mind.  You must always proceed with strength and clarity.  You must find ways to be joyful throughout this dismal journey, within this dark dull corner of the Nirmanakaya multiverse.

When we generate Bodhicitta, we are opening our heart and mind.  It is the key to enlightenment.  This world is the opposite of that, wishing, rather, for us to close our heart and mind, focusing on ego and ego gratification, so that we can effectively perpetuate our suffering for all eternity.

Something that occurred to me, as I was going through all the turmoil and storms of the energetic dimension, on my journey back to my life on Earth, was that this inevitable dimension that we must traverse in the death bardo can produce a lot of traumas, if we are not prepared for some very shocking surprises.  When we meditate, we can learn to remain at ease under any circumstance.  If we have greater capacity, then we can learn to transform anything.

Transformative meditation is typically what we would call the Vajrayana.  One should not make this sort of commitment lightly, because it will need to be completed once it has been started, or there will definitely be grave consequences.  This does not mean, however, that one cannot learn certain transformative practices outside of the Vajrayana.  By simply looking at things realistically, without getting all swept up by emotions, we can turn a negative into a positive for ourselves.

Let’s say you have a job that is toxic.  Once you realize that your job is killing you, you can decide to simply walk away.  You simply let go of things that are harming you.  This acknowledgement and letting go is transformative, and it happens because of Bodhicitta.  You have enough compassion for yourself that you simply allow yourself to let go of what is harming you.  Your realistic outlook allows you to have freedom.  You can detach yourself, you can walk away from things that have become obstacles to your own Spiritual Path.

Just as Dorothy in the Wizard of Oz, you go from a dark shadowy dismal world, opening the door into a world of beauty.  Your aspiration to awaken opens doors. 

Blessings in Light,               

Robert Aho