Hope and Fear

2024, October, Issue 117

Bound by our own misery, binding

Binding us to cyclic existence, binding

Binding mind to this illusion, binding

Binding this sleeping Buddha

To what is not real,

Fame to insignificance

Fortune to poverty

Praise to blame

Happiness to suffering,

Within this confusion

We wander.

A poem by Robert Aho © 2024

When we look at self, I mean really look closely at why self has appeared, we see something dependent upon its own misery.  It’s not real, but that is where this fixation dwells.  This notion of self appears out of enlightened mind itself; however, the sleeping Buddha does not know what to do with appearances, remaining in a state of ignorance.  Within this rather unfortunate situation, the sleeping Buddha creates an ego to defend all those things that revolve around self, trying its best to make all this grasping real, applying great effort to this ever-changing dream, doing whatever it can to reify appearances.

We hope, and then we fear, creating attachments to what is not real.  We hope for the best and we fear the worst, then complain about our misery.  This is cyclic existence, and it’s not real.

It takes great effort to be in cyclic existence.  It really should hurt your brain, applying this much effort.  We’re constantly conceptualizing, thinking this or that, doing our best to pin everything down.  This takes a lot of energy; and, this application of effort is really what prevents us from missing reality altogether.  Reality is ineffable.  It takes no effort whatsoever to realize our nondual condition, which is Ultimate Reality.

People who seek get stuck in extremes, thinking that everything is permanent or that everything is nothing.  Great Spiritual Masters warn their students about these extremes; however, they don’t apply this knowledge.  Perhaps these masters did not repeat the point often enough, because so many people act like they never heard them, taking the first exit ramp they can find off of the Spiritual Path.  If a student actually understands the essential points, then they would never veer off the Spiritual Path.  They wouldn’t have even the slightest reason to stop until they are fully enlightened.  Unfortunately, all too many make snap decisions about their own situation, going back to a firm reliance upon hope and fear.  Perhaps this is why we talk about the habituated mind.  In order to awaken, we need to break our addiction to belief and concept.

If we are able to relax completely, simply paying attention to what appears, without the slightest desire to reify any of it, then we’ve conquered something essential.  Try to do that for five minutes.  Then don’t try, just relax completely without concept.  Let the constant chatter in your mind pass by without elaboration.  Dismiss hope and fear from your narrative.  Lose the narrative and remain in objectless presence.

This is not so easy to do, because we have this feeling that we must always be doing something.  That’s our addiction.  That’s why we remain in cyclic existence, without the slightest ability to control anything, without any freedom whatsoever.  Our own effort prevents us from realizing the Nature of Mind.  It’s so simple.

Hoping for fortune or fame and fearing poverty and insignificance doesn’t really change the fact that you will be forgotten and have no treasure when you die.  You’ll go on to the next life and have to start all over again, then lose it all once more.

I’m often surprised when someone says they want to become famous, make a bunch of money, or try to make others praise them.  It seems like such a complete waste of time, entirely an act of futility.  There’s no point to it.  It’s like trying to become popular with waves on the ocean or print money while you fall from the sky.  People come and go, and their opinions change in this swirling commotion of the deluded mind, becoming something else before becoming anything at all.  Fortunes disappear in this scramble to take it all.

If we wish to traverse the death bardo with relative ease, then we can’t be at all concerned with worldly concerns.  Fame, insignificance, happiness, suffering, gain, loss, praise, blame, all of these things that we hope and fear are of no use whatsoever.  We need to be completely unconcerned about such things or we will have real problems when we die.

I think that my death experience was so complete because I did not let hope and fear cloud my experience.  I didn’t cling to worldly concerns.  I didn’t care about any of that in the least.  I think that I’ve made it very clear that I’m just here to help a little bit. 

Self, that self who disappeared into the light, is of absolutely no concern.  I know I’m just a figment of imagination.  Having died, I confidently discovered liberation.  Maybe I can communicate about this in such a way that an important point is transferred here or there, or perhaps it will be lost.

So, having no concern for this fabricated self, I have freedom.  Hope and fear appear as foolish notions, a complete waste of time.  I have no reason to hope or fear.  That is how I entered the death bardo.  That is how I returned.

Blessings in Light,               

Robert Aho